CXIV : Who?

I worked on the fraternity poster board with my co today because we need to show it off during the Class of 2015's orientation in about a week and a half. Another statement that makes me wonder, who am I?

After explaining to my roomie that we're working on the board for orientation, she asks:
Roomie: "I didn't know you were on board for LKS! What position are you guys? Are you co's?"
My co: "Yeah!"
Me: "Yup, for New member coordinator."
Roomie: "What position?"
Me: "New Member coordinator, like PC (pledge coordinator for her frat)."
Roomie: "What? REALLY? Mel?" *shocked look on face*
Me: "Yeah, I told you I was dragged into it." which is partially true, but in the end, I was the one who wanted to take up this challenge because I knew it didn't suit me.
My co: "?? What do you mean?"
Roomie: "I've known Mel since HIGH SCHOOL and I didn't expect this at all!"
Me: "..."

Makes me wonder, what kind of person am I aiming to be? I'm not always all reserved and quiet, and I only feel free and unconstrained with select people. I'd like to be a good balance of both wild and shy, if that's at all possible. Plus, why continue doing things that are expected of you when you know trying something new can be beneficial to your experiences?

CXIII : More Signs

Maybe I should just find signs people post up wherever I go. Here is one from the bathroom of a 76 gas station. Funny how you see these signs for modern toilets, but not for the hole-in-the-ground toilets. Or maybe, these signs are just in the US.

CXII : People in Society

I recently met up with a friend who I never really talked to since I started USC in undergrad. He had recently gone through many phases of being impulsive, heart-broken, dying on the inside, and slowly healing. When he talked about his experiences and what he learned from them, I wondered, people don't purposely go into these situations, do they? They just happen to come across it when the time comes. I realized that I'm always too afraid of having just this happen to me again and again, so I shy away from going into something without knowing if it will work or not, whether it's a relationship, a responsibility, or a position. I never felt responsible enough to take the blame for things that go wrongly or strong enough to hold together a mixture of personalities. Somehow, however, I have found myself in two officer positions for this coming school year, and the stress of planning for just this fall semester is piling up. Never before have I taken up this sort of responsibility-- to plan events that people will go to-- and never before have I felt I wanted to complain to people about how things are progressing, because it's not smooth at all. There's so much correspondence happening and not happening, I get frustrated but I'm not used to telling it to others, so I just believe that everything will be fine. Everything will be planned and ready on time. It's not like I'm terribly close to the deadline just yet, so there's plenty of time left to brush the plans into perfection, or close to perfection. So this is a taste of what it's like to be motivated to make something happen. It's only going to be great if the result is well accepted.

Another subject I chatted with my friend about was what people mean when they say "hot guys" or "hot women." Surely it's not about seeing a person predominantly naked and moving your eyes across their sharply defined muscles and bones. But according to google search, it pretty much seems to be so. Is it the bulk of the muscles that makes a man "hot"? Is it the slender legs and big breasts that make a woman "hot"? To me, if I have to base "hotness" on physical appearance, it's the eyes. A piercing stare, a mysteriously glazeless look, or a smiling pair of eyes-- eyes with some sort of emotion is, to me, what makes me attracted to a person's looks. I confess, there's some degree of muscular build, some degree of body shape, that goes into this description of "hot people," but the eyes capture the essence of "hotness." Maybe that's why I'm more into eyeshadows and liners than I used to be. I want to make my eyes more attractive because they can convey all types of emotion, making the eyes truly powerful.