VII : Writing

I used to think I hated writing because I was never very good at it. I was wordy, and still am. I couldn't think of the right words to use to express exactly how I wanted the reader to feel, and I still am. But I've come to realize that, just because I may not be able to say everything I intend to say in the first try, it doesn't mean I should hate it. It's like not giving up even if you suck. bluntly stated. Something that clear is too casually said though. How to present the right words without adding any fluff that can cause confusion?

When times get tough, I keep trying and even if the results are far from what I expect and hope for, I keep trying. Trying to improve. Trying to surprise. Trying to make happen my imagined results.

I tried. But I admit, I tweaked it a tiny bit already. Not much. Just added "imagined." Imagine a story...
and write. My personal statements for UCSF have really gotten me to think of the events in my life. How was I when I was little? What did I think of myself and what did others see? What were the turning points in my life? Do they still affect me today? What happened? How did specific people change me to whom I am now? It's all amazing to see myself develop, like I'm reading a book and seeing how the main character develops. Amazing. But it's too bad my writing is so full of unnecessary words. I like it, but it's because I can picture what I attach to my words. After tweaking, who knows if readers would be able to grasp that same picture as well. Hopefully.

Writing isn't all that bad at all. If only I had more ideas.